You meet her. You click. You wonder how you’ve never met her before, furthermore when you go to add her on Facebook and notice you have 100+ mutual friends. You make plans to see each other again, and then again the next day for brunch, and then again for a mid-week jaunt throughout the city, to events, to parties, for drinks and the like. She texts you when that guy she’s into texts her. You call her after you just ran into that one guy you were hoping you wouldn’t run into. The term bff gets thrown around, as do I love you’s. Two peas in a pretty little pod. Fast friends.
As the weeks continue on, they look the same. Similar. They’re filled with her and her tales and you and yours, tales which now seem to be overlapping since they mostly now involve each other. Welcome to the world of fast friends, made easier (and all the more common) thanks to technology at our leisure. Texting, Facebooking, Tweeting, DMing, PMing, emailing and the like. Everyone being available how you want, when you want, and then some.
So, is there something wrong with this new trend, which I like to call ‘fast friends?’ Well that depends. You see, we tend to get caught up in a moment, similar to how we do when we meet a new mate. We want to spend all our time with them and share ourselves with them. Now that can be fine, but come two or three months later, when the excitement of having a new bestie wears off, when you start to get to learn how she works and who she really is, behind that amazingly fun facade, the friendship feeling fades. Perhaps you find out she wasn’t as trusting as you hoped. Perhaps you find out she was just there for the fun times and couldn’t be there when you thought you needed her most. Perhaps another friend of hers came in the middle of you two and she made her choice, clear by her no longer being as available as her once overly-available self.
As far as fast friends go, indulge in them to a degree, but be weary. People come into our lives for reasons, and perhaps something about this immediate connection might make you a better you, or help you grow in some way. But, it can also hold you back. It can also affect other friendships with people who have been in your life for years; who you know aren’t around for the fun and games but who are loyal and have your best interest at heart.
Tread lightly. Enjoy the moment and don’t give too much too soon. Notice if what you’re putting out, you’re getting back in return.
– Jenny Jen
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